When he woke up...
He didn't recognize where he was..
He panicked...
Even moreso when he found his clothes and things all in their own places...
As if he'd been living in this strange place for a while..
He quickly put on the clothes on the floor...
A strange place for them...
He hated putting on old winkled clothes..
Though he felt like he might need to run..
He found his phone on his desk next to the bed...
He stopped to look lovingly at the desk...
It had all his family pictures...
The kids...
He loved them so...
He saw all around it were the gifts his true love had given him over the years...
He didn't know when he decided to display all the gifts like that...but he was sure it would please her to see he loved her gifts...her tangible love so much...
But then he saw a picture of someone new on the end of the desk...
Away from the rest...
Like he had to have it there but didn't want it...
He felt like he knew her...or should...but he didn't..
That scared him...
Did he have an actual daughter he didn't know about?
She looked like she was about his youngest sons age...
He spent the day finding out that he'd rented the strange house he woke up in...
Which was also inhabited by his middle school rebound and her 3 kids...
For the last 10 months...
And that not only was he broke, his credit ruined worse than with his ex wife, and that hardly anyone wanted to talk to him...
But that he'd been away from his true love...
His own two sons...
And abandoned his daughter too...
Not know that...
But he's spent the last 10 months being such an asshole to his love, for being loyal and loving to him while he fucked it all up...
Holding onto her belief in him to come back to her...
That she had said he couldn't see his kids until he got therapy again...
And he had made it worse by threatening to take her to court...
For what he wasn't even sure.
It seemed like a custody threat...or fight...
Though in looking at his inner foolishness, it appeared to him like she'd tried very hard to reasonable and fair the whole time...
And like there was no reason for him to be trying to kick things into court...
It looked like he hadn't even been paying child support.
He felt awful...
Even moreso when he spent the day dodging spiteful, needy, and confusing messages from his ex...
Who from his phone convos, seemed to be something between being on her way out of his house, or a roommate, or girlfriend, or fiance, or some strange thing in between...
And like an awful warden of some hellish place...
He was scared to talk to her..
Scared not to talk to her...
She reminded him of his ex wife..
He wanted to call his true love...
And his kids...
Though from the looks of things..
He had so much to try to explain..
And he didn't even remember any of it...
He knew she'd hate that...
It clearly meant he'd been drinking...
As did the piles and piles of beers he found in the garage when he got back and ran to lock himself in their to escape the chaos and drama inside, coming from the strange kids and his ex...who wouldn't stop touching him...
He felt like he was in hell...
What had he done?
He buried his head in his hands...
In a small cold garage closet where he put the Jesus painting he wasn't allowed to have in the house apparently...
He saw lots of things in there from his life with his love...and family...
He wasn't allowed to have any of it in the house apparently...
He saw Cabbie sitting there too...
He grabbed him and hugged him so tight...
Letting his tears soak his fur...
"Oh Cabbie...cabbie... What did I do?"
After a while, he saw beer on the bench...
He grabbed one... thinking he might as well...
But then he stopped...
He put the bottle down on the counter..
An decided that was the last thing he needed...
And that he really needed to quit once and for all..
And then he woke up...
It was the middle of the night...
His true love had he arms around his chest like she always liked to...
He was warm...
He felt safe...
His chest was no longer tight...
His ears didn't hurt..
He was "home"...
And he didn't even feel he needed to know where they were...
Only that "home" is where it's always been...
Anywhere in her arms...
With her in his arms...
He turned and pulled her close...
Her snoring stopped a little, and she firmed her hold on him in response...
He cried, "I love you soooo much..."
"Aww. I love you too Cabbit. So so much." She said
"Thank you for always believing in me." He sobbed.
She kissed him and he felt like he'd just had water dumped all over him after living in the desert the whole 10 months...
"Always.. my love..." She said, "forever and always.."
